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Mafia Gazette Past Issue 86
The Mafia Gazette Issue 86 For All The News That Is News (E&OE) Tuesday 4th April 'BEREAVED SON OFFERS 7 MILLION ' By: RiskyBusiness On April 2nd Paulo_DinardoJr Was seen walking down the street ranting and raving on about the recent happenings. What was on his mind was the recent death of his father. Apparently his father was seen as a thug after he was arrested for Tax evasion. Once word of his arrest hit the streets and people started to see him as a thug the attack came, Paulo's father was attacked and killed while walking down the streets of Chicago. Mr.Dinardo's father was a citizen of this world, who was a very well known man on the streets. Not only did he try to help out others by giving them money, but he also was a writer for the Gazette, a very good writer at that. Although many people may not have agreed what he had to say or how his family started in this world Dinardo tried to make a good name for himself. It seems that someone couldn't get over his history, and sadly he was killed. This is the reason Paulo_DinardoJr was ranting in the streets today. He is now offering 7 million dollars for the heads of every made man that walks these streets today. He is offering this because he is upset about what this world is turning into. So instead of trying to better it, he is giving in and following with the crowd. Soon Dinardo is leaving this world, and will not be coming back to us, he left us with these final words. "There is no real reason for my death, so now I’m making it that way for the rest of you, since someone out there had something to do with it, might as well have a bit of fun before I leave." It seems the ways of this world have upset another person, we will not be the same without this figure in our streets. Congratulations to everyone that did not want his family to have any say in our streets, you have done your job. 'NEW MAYOR OF CHICAGO ANNOUNCED ' By: Johnson On April 2nd Andersonnnnn was announced Mayor of Chicago. After a few days of hearing what the people had to say, and seeing how many people supported him, he finally had it made official. The people seem happy and so far it looks good for him. Andersonnnnn’s plans for Chicago include repaving the sidewalks in the rural areas, after receiving a few requests on the subject. He also stated that plans would be made to try and decrease the amount of mugging and gunfire in the city, which will require the help of some of the citizens, which it is thought that he will make an announcement about in the near future, most likely it is thought that he will ask about people willing to help the other citizens of the city. Early on when he first announced he was running for Mayor, there were some opposing the move, which were soon swayed over during one of his many speeches. He seems good with words and even went to great lengths already in trying to stop one man who was choosing people at random, and killing them in Chicago. When many people were dying in the city, he looked around to find out what the cause was. He finally concluded it was Ch0oseYourDeath, Made Man of The Midnight Society. After being approached, Ch0oseYourDeath decided he didn’t like being asked to leave a city, and simply kidnapped Andersonnnnn, holding him for 17 hours. Luckily he was not hurt and is still working to help stop people like this. I spoke with Andersonnnnn briefly in a quick interview, as he needed to get to a meeting and get some business done, but I managed to ask him a few questions, and he had this to say. “I hope to earn the respect of the citizens of this city, and the other great cities, and to help them when they need help. I also wish to lower the crime rate in the city, by any means necessary.” So as we can see, it seems we have a great Mayor for Chicago, and he looks like he will probably do great things for the city. 'NEWS IN BRIEF ' By: Kung_Capone DOES ANYONE CARE? Apparently Mr Dinardo doesn’t. HE went off on all the made killings today, and is not happy. He says that because of all the randoming and hatred in the towns today, there is no point in becoming made. He mentioned the deaths of Iwanna2 and Jimmy Page, two respected Mades, and said some mean comments. He has pleaded that all Mades need a chance. What is the world coming to? LAS VEGAS LOCKDOWN??? Yes, another bogus lockdown. Mr. Mick Gatto is willing to pay 7 dollars to anyone to leave LV. Come on guys! Its not funny anymore guys. Don’t be retarded. If your gonna lockdown, LOCKDOWN! Not that I’m encouraging you guys or anything but cut it out! 'TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR FAMIGLIA ' By:Sirico Me: Ma, dese are the best pasta & fagioli in the world. Mama: Same way your grandma used to make them. Me: You're the best ma. Mama: I'd do anything for my kids. Me: Really? Can you get me more bread please? Mama: Sure son, I'll warm it up in the oven first. Me: You're the best ma. Mama: Always take care of your family son, they are the most important thing you have in this world and don't you ever forget it! Finish your pasta, it's going to get cold. Here, have some more; we gotta keep you nice and healthy. Me: I will ma, I promise you. There you have it boys, you all know Italian moms are the best cooks. More importantly, my point here is that in our fast paced life, we often forget about our roots. We forget to make time for our families. By family I mean parents, grandparents, sisters, brothers, wife, children, and close friends. -Back In The Day- I'm sure most of us have fond memories of growing up in the old neighbourhood. You guys know what I'm talking about. Those hot summer days when you just hang around with your friends playing games. Then our mothers would come out on the balcony and scream at the top of their lungs, telling us it's time for lunch or dinner. My mom was practically the neighbourhood chef in those days. She'd have all my friends over for lunch just about every day. Madonn', she'd cook lunch for ten of us! This kept us going in our mischief until dinnertime. I'll never forget those days. I remember one day, my dad told me he was bringing me somewhere. "Where?" I asked. He told me it was a surprise. I was all excited, figuring he'd be taking me out for some gelato. Instead he brought me to see an old Sicilian fellow named Emilio. Emilio was a barber and he just about shaved my head. What a dirty trick! My mom almost killed my dad for that haircut. My dad just laughed, thought it was real funny. Ha ha dad, still a fond memory in retrospect. -Family Is Priceless- I also remember family gatherings, playing with my brother and sister when we were kids. Now we are all grown up and married, my parents are grandparents and they spoil the kids just enough, but not too much. My parents always took good care of my siblings and me. My sibs and I always look out for each other still to this day. If someone needs help, we are there, no questions asked. The world is a harsh place at times and good family helps us through the rough spots. But now it is time for us to take care of our parents, to return the favour. Never forget about your family, it is the most important thing you have in this world. Read on and I'll give you some good ways to keep the torch burning -Sunday Lunch- No matter how busy a person is, everyone needs to take a day off once in a while. Sunday is usually a quiet day on most fronts. Most offices are closed, although shopping malls are open (wasn't like that when I was kid!). A good way to stay in touch with your family is to make it a point to have lunch or dinner with them once per week or once every two weeks. What I suggest is the Sunday lunch. Most Italians I know still go to church Sunday morning, and then the whole family has a nice home cooked meal. There is no rush, no hassle. We can sit down, have a few glasses of homemade vino and enjoy a nice meal and conversation. The food is always nice, but what's nicer is being able to talk to our parents, brothers and sisters. To catch up on what's going on in their lives and provide support and encouragement to one another, especially in times of great need. Often other relatives are invited and we reminisce about the good times passed and good times ahead. We talk about how we overcame hardships and how everyone pulled together to make things work, for the family. -Full Disclosure- he Sunday lunch (could be the Tuesday dinner, whatever works for you guys) is meant to be a break from the hurly burly of modern life. We are always too rushed by business and other commitments to take some time out and just savour life. The beauty of the Sunday lunch is that it keeps everyone in touch. It helps keep the strong family ties together, from one generation to the next. If you don't live in the same city as your family, you should make it a point to call them once a week and talk to them, find out about everything that's going in their lives. Remember, your grandparents (if you are still lucky enough to have them) won't be around forever. Neither will your parents. And once they are gone, all you'll have are memories. So make the most of the time you have with them today and one day, you'll look back and think about those great memories. You might even get a tear in the corner of your eye (yes, my eyes get watery when thinking about my family, they are important to me) and a smile on your face. Take it from me, always put your family first and they will do the same for you. All the money in the world can't buy you closeness with your family; you have to make that happen yourself. And you should make it happen, there is nothing sadder than kids that don't know their grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins. Watch your back boys and keep your noses clean. 'EDITORIAL ' Here I am again, another column to share my views on certain happenings in our community of late. This week, I would like to continue my personal views on the state of the community as it stands with a particular view of hit lists and hits in general. The main reason for my writing this is that I recently received a note from a very new member of the community. This note was supposedly from a wealthy member of the community who wished to remain anonymous, however with no proof of this forthcoming, the provenance of the message is very much in question. I attempted to determine the source of the note to no avail, hence the editorial rather than a real news story. As we now have the preliminary to the story out the way, I will go on with the reason for writing and a bit more detail on the note received. Names may be changed where identities are withheld for reasons that will become apparent. Over the past week we have seen a lot in the way of people offering money for the deaths of those bosses on a certain side, or perceived to be on a certain side, with the most publicised one coming from Jimmy Hoffa. I spoke to Jimmy following the last issue of the newspaper where we reported his apparent error where he dealt with information provided by a Conceptualist and paid for it. In our conversation, he stated that he knew exactly what he was doing at the time, paying a mere fifty thousand for the information where he would have paid anything up to a quarter of a million had the information been more worth the price. Also in the conversation, Jimmy stated that if the Conceptualists were really retired, then all his hits were null and void, although this wasn’t made public that I am aware of. We are still seeing hitters taking shots at people like HeavyweightHammer and Angel_Islington, both wrongly accused of being Concepts and both supposedly no longer under threat. Jimmy also said that he had spoken to those on his list that were definitely there because of bad information and removed them from his hitlist, but this was prior to last Tuesday’s announcement of the Conceptualists retiring. As far as can be determined, neither Islington nor Hammer were ever members of the Conceptualists, and others mentioned in conjunction with the Concepts are similarly unconnected except by dint of the side they chose in the recent East/West split. Islington remained neutral, but moved into Las Vegas, the old stomping ground of her ancestors when ASDA left it vacant. Hammer moved to New York following the killing of one of his Made Men at the hands of one of ASDA, as reported recently. He felt that there was greater safety away from his supposed allies who would kill his own in cold blood and then deny any involvement until hands were forced. Albert-Neri and AphexTwin, leader of the Apostles and his successor who ran a sister crew when Neri came out of retirement both moved to New York, the original home of Neri which he was driven out of as Street Boss by the Conceptualists. Under the latest split between East and West, and a disagreement with ASDA policy, there was only one direction that Neri could sensibly take, and he went home to his old stomping ground. The shifts by some were seen as a move into the Concept camp and Concept crew, but each of the families on the East maintained their own identities, and still do even after the apparent disappearance of the Concepts. We now have The Damned, Apostles and Midnight Society on the East Coast, with the ghost of ASDA sitting alongside Islington as she Minds The Gap on the West. The central belt has yet to throw up any family that has become a power on the streets or a known name and the East/West divide remains. The sniping still continues with various conversations and posters appearing on the streets, with most of the sniping now coming from the ASDA ghosts, mostly from Marcel and with occasional comment from JimmyRoastBeef, although the Beef lineage appears to have become much quieter following his father’s step out from legal citizenship, a return to a life of crime and untimely death. In this climate, with no Concepts on the horizon, although it is unlikely they have disappeared entirely, there is speculation as to what the policies are of the remaining bosses in the East. It is with this in mind that I go back to the subject of the anonymous letter. The letter, penned apparently by someone with the initial “P” claims that one of the bosses has so offended the writer that there is now a very large sum of money available to the person who kills the boss. This was, I presume, supposed to be printed in full in Friday’s newspaper, but owing to circumstance beyond my control, that edition never made it to the stands. There was a deadline of a week set before the amount of money halved, although this still left it quite a large sum, enough to tempt many. As I am unable to determine who placed the hit, I can’t tell you if the deadline has passed, will be extended or even if the hit still exists. It makes me question a few things, as most hits or supported killings do. I queried and spoke out against the killing of Kiss This: The motives and methods used by one citizen who seemed to put themselves in the position where they were the ones to say who should or shouldn’t survive in this life of crime the victims live in. The whole questioning of who really has the right to decide who should or shouldn’t live is one that a lot of people have looked at and spoken out about, and those that sit and dictate by use of money who will be alive tomorrow morning undermine everything Mafia in this world. Citizens sit on the sidelines, catcalling at the big players, safe in the knowledge that they are untouchable. It now seems that someone has decided that the newspaper is a good vehicle for this invincibility, sniping at yet another boss from behind the name of the Gazette. There is the other side of the coin, where people are aware of the connection between the paper and the boss in question, and the other thought that came to mind was whether I was being tested. Was I being fed this information about the boss and the person’s thoughts about the Concepts to find out whether there was a bias in my writing or the reporting in the Gazette? Either way, the whole question made me take a step back from the story and look at it more critically. I have examined it from so many angles before sitting down to write, that I doubt there is anything more I can cover in my own mind. I was lambasted once before for writing up a story about a hit on another member of the upper echelons of our Mafia community, and this has stayed my hand from printing any details about this one that has landed on my desk now. The very families of the person who has sent this note in now reminded me of my “place” in our society then, and clearly these views have changed when the boot is on the other foot. I do have some clues as to where the note came from, as the content and the delivery boy’s identity made it quite clear which side of the fence the missive was sent from. I have had a lot of people complain that I have been very anti-ASDA of late, but to be honest, when I am dealing with things like this, sent by people with no face but clear agendas, attempting to use the newspaper to their own ends when it suits them, and claim their disgust in public that the newspaper is biased against them, I have very little choice in my actions. I’m sorry, but the newspaper will carry the news, but it won’t be used as a vehicle for personal vendettas. It is sad that it has come to the state where people feel they can skew the news to their own ends rather than fighting in the open. The note demanded that the person who took the hit and succeeded should be very public in their claiming of the kill to have the money given to their descendant or relative. Forgive me for thinking that there is a problem with that, but the sum of money mentioned, handed over to a brand new arrival to these shores? How long would it take for that sum to be removed by mugging, or if the person is sensible enough to wait till their bank is processed, how long before a kill shot is taken so that money doesn’t have to be paid? Call me cynical, but I doubt anyone would survive long enough after announcing the kill to write a will passing on the riches to anyone, let alone have them or their descendants last long enough to enjoy any of the wealth. Hits on members of the community are becoming more and more commonplace with a new set for seven million being posted just recently by the disgruntled son of one of my deceased employees. It begs the question whether people will see the other side of that particular coin, and work out that it may be more beneficial in the long run to protect the ranking members of the community rather than kill them for the thirty pieces of silver that some are determined to sell our community for. Society now seems more based on distrust, backstabbing, betrayal, lies and petty thuggery, where it should be about honour, honesty, and family. I watch the streets and I see so much of what is going on with a broad view where most are blinkered by personal issues. Personal is not the same as important, and people should remember that in their dealings. I print the news that my writers write for me, and they pick up most of what is happening from the street. If it’s out there, it’s news, and it doesn’t matter which side is making the news either. I don’t pick sides: I report what people will give me information on, and if people don’t talk, then I don’t get to print their side. If people act like children on the streets, then that is what will make the news. If you want to know my politics, please don’t try to guess them from the stories I print, especially not if I’m not the one who wrote them in the first place. I will round up here with a reminder to people: The newspaper cannot be bought or used for political gain. I cannot be swayed or used to convey hits to or on people. You, the community, taught me the folly of that move, and here I am, with a similar piece of information still sitting on my desk, and I will do nothing with it. If it is that much of a big deal, then I’m sure the originator of the hit can manage to deal with it quietly and privately rather than using your newspaper for their nefarious schemes. 'FEATURED POEM ' From: ForgetMeNot Reflect You have seen the news before But now you see the knife Your on the news, your on at least You have been killed. You have passed away But live to see, Live to read the news But the paper is blank Seems like nobody cares. Maybe if you where god People might care about you So never stop, And tell people you’re here So you will never be for forgotten Even when you die. 'CONSTANZIA’S CORNER ' By: Constanzia_Corleone Victim or Criminal? You decide: When someone is shot and hurt or killed, everyone cries out, “He or she is the victim of a horrible crime or misunderstanding.” Many of the times, the person injured or killed was also carrying some type of weapon and was just a little slower than the other person. Had it been reversed, people would be crying out in the same manner. It should be considered a constant that if one is carrying a weapon, with the exception of most of law enforcement, they are criminals. Victims, in this reporter’s opinion are children, older folks, and ladies, especially ladies with child. Anyone who is shot “accidentally” during a crime or assassination. These innocents are the ones needing special consideration before a weapon is drawn and assaults to take place. What have you decided? 'PICASSO’S PROFILING ' PICASSO’S PROFILING Ever wondered what other people thought of your name and how you presented yourself? Mail me for a $FREE profile rating and review and prepare to be lauded or laughed at. Each issues Star Profile wins $50k. Zie_Funkmeister: This has to be one of my favourite names around here. It is the epitome of groovyness and fun. It is great to see a name used in conjunction with actions and RP value. There seems to be a bit of a foreign twist to this name and for me it is one that is instantly recognisable. Name = 9 Picasso Points. This black and white picture works excellently with the overall look of this thing of ours. The scene appears to be futuristic and shows a tall bald man wearing a spectacular pair of goggles. He has an almost Gestapo style coat on and is carrying a briefcase. I get the impression that he is the mad scientist type of character. Picture = 8 Picasso Points. ~Zie_Funkmeister scores 8.5 Picasso Points. Vismund_Cyngus: What a strange name. It would to appear to be Central/Eastern European in origin. I would imagine you to be some sort of shady, mysterious character with a name like this. As well as sounding foreign, it seems to have an element of wackiness accompanying it. Name = 7 Picasso Points. Wow. What the heck is going on here? Your picture shows a man wearing a suit with his head covered with some sort of cloth or sack. I really have no idea what is going on here. It is all rather frightening. I think I can safely conclude that you sir, are a fruitcake. The mind boggles. It really does. Picture = 8 Picasso Points. ~Vismund_Cyngus scores 7.5 Picasso Points. Isabella--Rossellini: This is a good strong Italian name in my opinion. Both forename and surnames appear to be classically Italian. Obviously yours fits in very well in this world. I think that these sort of names show a bit of class and quality, I would like to see more of them. Name = 8 Picasso Points. What a very original picture. I don’t think I have seen one quite like it before. It is very psychedelic and colourful. The outline of the figure and he writing is almost neon against the black background. This is a very different, very vibrant picture and is quite a refreshing change. Picture = 8 Picasso Points. ~Isabella--Rossellini scores 8 Picasso Points. Fletch-Tewksberry: Haha, this is another one of those funny looking names that brings a smile to my face. Although uncommon, I think most people have encountered the forename before. The surname, however, is something quite different. It appears to have been thrown together and made up randomly on the spot. Quite intriguing mind you. Name = 8 Picasso Points. Any picture with Chevy Chase in it scores bonus points. o/ This is quite a comical scene, he is flashing all of his ID cards as we stand with the perspective of pointing a gun at him. At the same time, he is giving us a rather humorous line. Another black and white image that works very well. Picture = 8 Picasso Points. ~Fletch-Tewksberry scores 8 Picasso Points. Keyser-Sose: I imagine that your name is misspelled because ‘Soze’ was your father and is dead. I like the original name but I’m not a fan of misspelling the ones that follow it just to keep it alive. Keyser Soze was a fantastic character from an excellent movie. You have a lot to live up to. Name = 6 Picasso Points. Your picture is pretty good for a couple of reasons. It is relevant to mafia life as it shows a gunman. It is also well personalized with your name on it. The thing I like most though, is that appears to have been done in chalks. I think that this adds an extra dimension to the image. A very nice artistic effort. Picture = 8 Picasso Points. ~Keyser-Sose scores 7 Picasso Points. That means that this issues Picasso Star Profile is awarded to Zie_Funkmeister. Congratulations, $50k and bragging rights are yours. 'CLASSIFIEDS ' Do you enjoy Sports? Do you enjoy betting? Then TnT Sports Betting is for you! Found on the streets forum, TnT S.B. is a great way to make money while having fun. Check out TnT Sports Betting...TODAY! -Tiker Founder and Dominating shareholder of TnT Sports Betting. 02:58, February 15, 2013 (UTC)02:58, February 15, 2013 (UTC) For Sale: Black Stallion. Comes to 'Retarded Engine' Very promising horse. Priced to sell. $599,999. Contact Tiker for more details. Anyone wishing to place an ad should send it in to CarmelaDeAngelis c/o the Mafia Gazette. All ads are free, but must still fall within the set guidelines.